nickelbackthatassup:

no emoji in the world can replace the depth of :/

sitsinchairs:

crocsy:

Sexting

Straight couples are fucking weird.

dogalyst:

idk i really like being called cute but i also really like hearing that you masturbate to the thought of me idk

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”
There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her."No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”
And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”

There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her.
"No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”

And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

iwascooleryesterday:

eldejarnette:

validx2:

sendeccentric:

thahalfrican:

bvsdpvpi:

when bae brings up “other ho’s”

When bae point out your other hoes in ya phone like “who dis??”

when a bitch trine to catch me slippin


When you try to act like you dont remember textin that hoe 

When she tells you that you’re the only nigga she talking too

LMFAOOO

iwascooleryesterday:

eldejarnette:

validx2:

sendeccentric:

thahalfrican:

bvsdpvpi:

when bae brings up “other ho’s”

When bae point out your other hoes in ya phone like “who dis??”

when a bitch trine to catch me slippin

When you try to act like you dont remember textin that hoe

When she tells you that you’re the only nigga she talking too

LMFAOOO

slightlynerdish:

Get back in there

slightlynerdish:

Get back in there

sidnugget:

when did i get this fat

2srooky:

abunchofgrapes:

2srooky:

whyamisospooky:

you’re such a b**** (bagel)

image

why is ewan mcgregor saying that in front of a waterfall

Why not.